I miss her so much =(

Haiz.. seen the sch end n no nid to go sch anymore i have been missing her so much everyday thinking of her, worry about her n other else.. i just cant miss her smile her laughter her voice n her aegyo(act cute) cuz she the cutest gal i ever see, she always make me laugh n happy when i always beside her i always feel wan to stay by her side n protect her^^ but.. tat cant be real becuz i no she dun like me she onli treat me as her oppa(brother) but i wan to be her bf n can take care of her n when she nid me i can anytime be by her side to comfort her. but tat is impossible nvm la i just be a fool n be her guardian angel protecting her if when she nid me or sth else i will be ritez there for her. ''Mandy ah.. oppa jinja miss u so much hope we meet up again n go out 2gether ok??'' kk i write until here then bb~~

~KiRa~

Feel so sad n lonely keeping thinking about sad thing n my crush=(

Omg.. its raining again haiz just now at dhoby ghaut waiting bus 4 about half hr then come zzz pluz is raining somemore haiz... nvm at bus stop listen song then suddenly 1 of my song(BEAST - On The Rainy Day) play it just the rite timing then when i listen 2 it, it me make feel so sad n lonely like there's no1 care about me or no frenz like tat haha..=( dunno la everytime raining it make me feel sad n lonely n will think alot sad thing haiz... but actually everytime i feel quite lonely n sad but on rainy day i feel even more sad n lonely.. btw this coming sunday will be my 20 years old birthday aready wow.. time past really fast n i going 2 20yr old soon ha... no more teen life n i will be going 2 my NS soon next yr 12 march police force.. btw this yr birthday i decide not 2 celebrate again i dunno y i dun feel like celebrating nvm... lets c on my fb got ppl wish me happy birthday anot i guess got but onli a few onli maybe less then 10?? dunno lets wait then pluz my sch days going 2 end soon left 1wk 2 my exam then holiday then i wont able 2 c my crush(mandy) going 2 miss her so much n my other classmate anyway i hope my up coming exam will pass n i wish my other classmate n mandy will score high mark n go higher nitec or poly n finally wish mandy can take care herself well cuz she get sick easily i'm very worried about her n hope she can find a guy really can take care of her.. =) kk i will write until here then annyeong..

~KiRa~

finally sch holiday but very bored at home & my crush is gone cuz she have new bf le happy for her

Annyeonghasaeyo it been 2wk seen my last update haha.. Yea!! it finally sch holiday i can relaz myself but quite bored cuz nth 2 do other then working out 2 keep fit cuz my frenz tell me about the mooncake tat work looks like dun have le then nvm lorz this 2wk hw am i going 2 spend worz zzz.. Btw last time i had post about my crush on 1 of my classmate rite? haha no more aready cuz on tue i ask my frenz crystal izzt mandy(my crush) n hong jie 2gether? she say yes, hong jie is a frenz of my but not tat close cuz he from other class i onli meet n talk 2 him a few time then nvm lorz i tell crystal tat i aready no this secret about mandy n hong jie then she tell me 2 keep as a secert cuz she say mandy dun wan 2 let other ppl no other then us we no can aready then on the day i found this secert is true i was so sheck n abit sad nvm lorz i pretend tat i was like o.o.. like tat but actually my heart was so hurting but nvm la there was a word say: it urs it will be urs if not urs it will not be urs look like this word is real haha then i had a argeement 2 myself after sch reopen i try not 2 be so close 2 her(mandy) again i try 2 stay away or avoid her this is all i think when yesterday i otw heading 2 sch my life is so sad life haiz... nvm i write until here then annyeong~~

~KiRa~

zzz my com got prob zz..

zzz 2day when i on com n play game everything is normal until when i wan go watch video i wan use my x-mini speaker 2 plug on 2 my com i sudden realize hw come the sound nv came out from the speaker, at first i thot it was my speaker damage or wat then i use my phone 2 try n play song but nth wrong then i went back 2 try again it still no sound then i take a earpiece 2 try still no sound zz my headset plug is damage damn.. like tat i wont able 2 use my speaker 2 listen 2 any video tat the sound lvl is very shyt... i was thinking 2 repair it but i think again onli just 2 repair tat part is not worth lorz then nvm i think i going listen without my speaker haiz zzz.... kk i write until here then annyeong~~

~KiRa~

holiday coming soon haiz.... -.-"

2day is teacher n i dun nid 2 go sch n i can sleep more but dunno y 2day my body it auto wake me up at 8.25am zzzz then i dun feel like sleeping anymore i get up n go wash up my face n teeth then eat my breakfast after eating i on com n watch korean variety show on9 after watching i go play my game 4 few match then nth 2 do go youtube n listen 2 song cuz i have nth 2 do pluz do nid go sch ma so boring at home n i 2day not having a good mood dunno y zz nvm pluz 1wk more my sch holiday going 2 start soon but this time my holiday onli just got 2wk so litte nvm lorz but i  really hope is my frenz got the job 2 sell mooncake n ask me go if not i at home will bored til death zzz.. Btw yesterday i just bought my first n ever booster pack box 4 vanguard i bought it about $75 actually is $70 but dunno y yesterday go buy they increase by $5 zzz nvm i buy after i buy i go open all i hope 2 get my foil card i nid 4 my RP(Royal Paladin) deck but sadly n unlucky all the foil is 4 other clan zzz nvm then i hope i got other better card 2 recustom make my deck but... still dun have onli a few card i nid wa.... i was like 'WTF i spend $75 all i get is piece of crap zzz' i thot if i spend $75 i get good card worth but it turn out not tat good i have waste it man nvm this will be my last time 2 buy a box if i wan buy again i will buy it when i got work if not i will not buy. Btw next wk i will abit bored at sch cuz my crush(mandy) it going oversea trip 4 her cca with some of my classmate n her cca frenz then i onli can c her onli on mon n tue zz cuz wed she going 2 oversea aready then must wait until my 2wk sch holiday finish then can c each other again haiz nvm la cuz my other frenz alvin is going 2 same like me cuz my classmate zuki oso going n whereby they 2 very close until they like couple haha nvm la we just wait until 2wk holiday finish then meet ba kk i will write until here then annyeong~~

~KiRa~

2day go sch really really boring.. zz..

2day really boring day at sch zzz... bcuz first lesson is swimming pool lesson at there totally do nth i mean it is NTH!! all we do in class in watch video on phone or listen song or play game on phone then we so bored nvm then we go have our afternoon break damn long from 10am to 12.30pm zzz.. kk nvm after our break finish we go 4 2nd lesson about fire panel system me n my frenz at 2nd floor waiting 4 teacher 2 come when he came i ask him 2day do wat he say 'nth' when i heard he say tat i was so OMG!! cuz our last lesson is on 4pm then start then i look at the time on my phone is just 12.50pm n our last lesson is 3hr+ then will start i was so fed up zz.. then my frenz ask teacher wat we going 2 do then our teacher tell 2 go in n sit there relaz wa.... so sianz after we went in class all we do is watch video, play, listen 2 song on phone or sleep zzz nvm lorz then when about 3pm teacher mark our attendend then we can go aready then i ask my frenz where u all wan go some wan go eat then we went 2 c1 2 eat i follow go eat the malay stall fried rice n the price is just onli $2 n is very big plate OMG!! nvm after eating i ask my frenz alvin where is mandy n zuki my other 2 classmate who go 2 other sch 2 present their powerpoint then he say they on the way back 2 sch i say kk we go 3rd floor wait them otw 2 lift we go buy some sweet then suddenly both of them pop out behind us then we go 2 3rd floor 2gether play table tennis we my other frenz 4 awhile b4 heading 2 the last lesson after playing finish we go 2 class at the class our teacher give us the last wk paper ans whereby we aready do aready then we tell him the ans again then when my frenz zuki she tell me we talk in other style of langauges 2 ans we say until we laugh like hell hahaha... kk then tell end class early after we end my both gal de frenz when go buy thing outside cvc(customer service center) after then buy liao 1 of my classmate who tag along she say she wan go east point buy thing ok can we all follow her go n buy. kk when we reach east point my frenz tat wan buy thing she wan go take money then mandy go follow me n other go 2nd floor wait 4 them then when zuki who came back first she ask where other i say they at there sitting then she went in 2 watson then awhile i went in i ask her wat she look 4? then she say tat wan at first i dunno wat she mean after awhile i realize i ask her y u wan? then she say no is crystal the gal who wan go east point buy thing then after awhile all the other came in btw the thing is "condom" after my other frenz came in they ask me wat crystal wan 2 buy at first i was abit shy 2 say it out then i tell mandy first after tat slowly i tell the other then when they all no they keep saying crystal y she buy la n wat so ever then when crystal decided 2 go 7-11 2 buy zuki accompany her go they at there think very long 2 buy anot after when crystal take n go pay then when they both came out they were so shy then i ask crystal can give 1 cuz i wan 2 give my frenz as birthday present then she ok lorz but then she ask me u keep i say no then zuki sudden say i keep 2moro then give kk after talk finish zuki n alvin they went back sch find frenz n study 2gether me mandy n other take train went home liao then lets hope n c 2moro wat would sth happen 2 my birthday frenz on class hahaha cant wait XD!!! kk i will write until here then bb~~

~KiRa~

2day at sch quite boring haha...

Annyeonghasaeyo i'm back n as normal 2day go sch quite boring first i go meet n frenz at c1 4 breaksfast after eat finish we went 2 stadium 4 pe but when we reach there alot ppl was gathering around there dunno 4 wat then when i saw a banner on the field it say'Rice walk for charity' when i saw those word i was so fed up even my frenz oso haiz actually we thot of running away from this stupid walk but 2 bad our pe spotted us then tell 2 come down then we went down we ask him wat we going 2 do walk with them? then he say 'yes' we all was like 'teacher can dun go ma?' but he say cant so sianz nvm lorz we just go walk but we walk from very behind we let all other go first. Btw this is like u walk 100m u can donate 1 bowl of rice 2 those needy then when we was walking it was raining abit n we walk abit faster when we was finish is like about 1km then student leader give us a paper there say' u have walk 1km n have donated 10bowl of rice 2 needy' zzz nvm after tat we gather at near c1 there then at there 2 of my frenz had a little misunderstand prob aiya dun care them after they solve the prob we went 4 our last lesson after finish the lesson me n my other 2 frenz we went 2 tm 2 watch movie 'the dairy of the whimpy kidz dog days' the show is so so after watching 1 frenz went home first i with another frenz go eat cuz we 2 hungry haha.. n i have brought a polo t-shirt 4 my cousin birthday 2moro after i when home.. kk then i will write until here then bb~~

~KiRa~

When will i able to find a haircut tat suit me??

Annyeonghasaeyo 2day i wake up quite early around 8am+ nth 2 do laying on my bed open tv n watch c got any show so sianz no show cuz 2day is hari raya zzz nvm then wake up go wash fash&teeth then go eat breakfast then after tat on com n play 4 awhile then after i go take a shower then back 2 com n go google find a hairstyle tat suit me but i cant find any of it everytime i wan find is so hard sometime i find a nice wan i wan try but i scare it not suit me cuz i have a round face n fat zz after i give up finding i go take money n went down 2 salon n trim my hair short after i came back i feel it look so weird haiz everytime i go out with my frenz i saw alot guys hairstyle look so nice n style n i always wish i could have nice hairstyle like them but i dunno hw 2 say 2 cut until like their hairstyle. Nvm i think when i grow older i think i still wont able 2 find a suitable hairstyle 4 my ownself sad=( kk then i will write until here then annyeong~~

~KiRa~

I not worth to have any crush or to love someone else

Haiz i'm so dead i have crush on 1 of my classmate but i cant do tat cuz she have bf aready but last mth they broke up. Pluz i cant like her cuz i not fit 2 n i think she onli treat me as her oppa(brother in korean) yea i no tat this is very annoying haha nvm, so the onli thing i can do is 2 just stay beside her onli lorz but my other classmate think tat we 2 very close until like couple zzz nvm this wat they think but 4 me no i nv think this way even i like her cuz i have aready tell myself tat i wont find any gf 4eva cuz i not romantic or wat so ever thing so if i have gf i sure like not even 1day? or maybe 1wk? then break up aready so i just remain silence n keep it in my heart haha kk i write until here then bb~~

~KiRa~

Life is so tiring for me =(

It been few yrs seen my last post. Haiz everyday when i wake up i always feel so sad n stressful seen i was born everything dun seen 2 be right like i was born 2 be a jinx or a middle person between my parents cuz from wat i no is tat be4 i was born my parent were a lovely couple n after i was little n until now my parent was like everyday fight fight then they wan 2 talk they always ask me 2 tell either 1 of them say wat like i was a messenger stuck in between them so fed up!! even until now they have divorced i still their messenger haiz.... now my life is so fed up, stress n full of sadness. N seen 3yrs back my parent decided 2 sell our house a bedok my life has become worst now i have 2 live my grandparents n my mother have 2 keep move house house by herself cuz is rented wan btw she now cant buy any house yet bcuz the law said must wait atless 2yrs then can buy then she have no choice 2 rent house illegally or she have no place 2 stay but 4 me i got a place 2 stay but i feel so uncomfortable staying at my grandparent house cuz i have give them alot trouble n problem but they still love me i dunno y but i feel so ashame i feel so useless n like a dumbass, i dun dare 2 go find part time work 2 do n earn so money nid take money from them i really feel so useless all i can think is play, go with frenz n use money onli this all i can do haiz... i always feel like "y i was born 2 this world n give ppl so many trouble n problem i shld not had born if i would be born i wish i was born 2 be a tree or maybe animal i dun wan 2 be human" cuz human nid 2 think alot think but onli when they r little they dun nid 2 think so much but each u grow up u start 2 think haiz nvm la my life is like no 1 can understand my feeling n tat y i from young i keep telling my frenz n family i wan 2 be single 4eva cuz i have no money, useless, not clever n other thing 2 have a gf so y not just 2 be single n watch all my other frenz n family have couple n i just watch..^^ ok i will write until here then anyway no1 will no this i write haha.. bye~~

~KiRa~